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What to do if you're pregnant and someone you loves dies?

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dragonfly forty-six Profile

I have two children and it happened to me with both pregnancies. The first loss was my father. I was 6 months pregnant. The second was my beloved grandmother. I was 4 months pregnant.

My mother is an RN. She worked in Labor and Delivery for years. She explained to me the affects of depression and mourning on a growing fetus. She said for me to think about my child and to try and do my best to contain my grief as best as I could. It was near impossible but I did. I didn't do anything to compromise my baby. No drinking, smoking, pill popping. Except for the funeral I did very little crying. My loved ones were dead, but my baby wasn't. I chose life. I spoke to my doctor and he gave me ideas of how to cope. I went to a grief counselor. When my babies were born, then I grieved. I cried for days. My family helped me care for the babies while I grieved. It was one of the hardest times of my life. Still brings tears to my eyes thinking about that pain. I wish you the best. My condolences.

Janis Haskell Profile
Janis Haskell answered

Remember that your loved one would want you to take good care of yourself and your baby.  Doing that is one way you can honor their memory.

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